We
so often lose our way when we are the ones "left". Someone
tells us at the funeral (or we tell ourselves) that we must now
be "strong" for our remaining parent. We watch our "Only"
parent cry or act differently now. We are confused by the loss
of not only the love of the parent we buried, but the temporary
withdrawal or direction of our parent who remains.
People
mistakenly think, "you are taking this so well" when
we don't cry every minute, when inside we are crying every minute.
Each day reminds us we are now on this new path and scared to
death that we must now survive alone and unguided in the world.
We worry that we will not only have to go it alone, but that we
may also soon lose the remaining parents love and respect. They
are looking to us to be strong, and when we let them down it feels
like we have suffered the loss all over again. Some of us have
lost a "best friend" as well as a loved parent.
The
loss of a parent is FOREVER. The loss of the Guide and Friend
is much different than the loss of a child or mate. But we want
to focus in on the HELP that we can get from others. Like what
to do that first Mother's Day, first Father's Day; what to do
when someone says to you "oh so you’re an orphan".
This sharing reminds us we are all very NORMAL, that we are just
in grief. Healing doesn't come in a month...we don't just "get
over it". Healing doesn't mean "FORGETTING" it
means that you are able to move on carrying the love of the person
that meant so much to you. When you "share" these things
with someone that really understands, you begin to heal. The heavy
weight gets easier, and you don't just "get over it"
you heal. And that's what Guiding Angels is all about, time to
get together and share.
When
our branch is not meeting for chat, please click here to enter Grief
Recovery Chatroom, which is opened 24 hours a day.
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